October 12/ Dear Radish

Dear Radish,

 
I hate my house.  I hate my house.  I incorrectly chose this house that I live in.  The roof has leaked,  there are tadpoles in the toilets, the walls have huge flakes that come off the wall.  I chose this house in a weekend.  What to do?

Anon.  

Dear House Sufferer, 

Tad poles in the toilet?  Need I ask if they turn to frogs.  Get out of that house straight away.   If you are moving to a new community, as in different state or even country, do not choose a house before you move.  First put yourself up in a grand hotel, and from that vantage point look for your precious new home.  

Now given the climate, decide in what direction you want your house to face.  Where is the sun?  Do you want to see it?  Do you want to see your neighbors? Neighbors are such a hit and miss.  Do not move next to a house with men in black suits standing in front of the house.  Generally this means there is a drug cartel member living inside.  Look to see where the snivelers are going to be.  Will the house be quiet or loud? Is the kitchen big enough for your husband to cook when you are flattened.   Flush toilets, turn on the faucets and the lights. Sleep on it.  Go back through the house.  

Ask your self if you are going to run this house, or is this house going to be running you.  

Fondly, Radish

 

Try to go to new site   http://day2dayradishes.squarespace.com

Comments

[expat princess]

Thanks for the post, Radish. The irony is that I did all those things! Also, the men in black could be politicians. That's been my experience.